The Antics of Grand Pratt

(Gertrude Rosa Burgess) (1874-1958)

As told by Florence Eveline Jenner (1901-1994):

I had Grand Pratt [Gertrude Rosa Baglin, née Burgess) from the time we were married [Eva’s marriage to Grand Pratt’s son, Edward William Burgess Baglin]. I had both our mothers in their last years, but our mum wasn't so bad, wasn't like Grand Pratt. We did suggest making the front room into a sitting room for the both of them - A place where they could sit and chat to each other, and keep each other company, and that sort of thing. But grandmother (Grand Pratt) wouldn't have it - No she wouldn't have that at all. Ted wasn't like that - He couldn't be, because we always had people in. His drawbridge (privacy) was with his rabbits, in the shed at the bottom of the garden. He used to spend hours there, so it worked out all right.

Grand Pratt had a mirror in every corner of the room - If you was down the road and happened to be facing her way, she'd know what you'd been saying. But what used to really get me mad all inside was when she saw Ted cycling down the road - She'd open the sash windows and sort of sing out "Teddy Baglin Waggling Jiggling Jaggling" - I used to say to Ted "Go on - put your little five year old trunks on then, and go out and play."

One time she was going on at me like `Old Nick' - I then chased her up the stairs - sitting her down half way up. I said to her "You've had your say, now I'm going to have my say" - And you know, I started laughing -I had to speak through that blooming ear trumpet, I could never speak through that blessed thing without laughing.

Then there was that time we were in the kitchen with her, she was moving up and down on her toes, while making jam, up and down, up and down, singing - out of key because she was deaf - all while she was stirring the jam. That used to annoy me. Then Grace was being rude to her, calling her a "Silly old goat" or something - knowing that Gran couldn't hear her, or see her and thus not lip-read. I was telling her off for being rude to Gran, and Gran said to Grace "I know she's talking about me". I got so mad; I just picked up the nearest thing to me, the frying pan, and through it at her. It missed her head by inches and hit the back door. The frying pan buckled and fell to the floor with an almighty clatter - Gran said, "Did you drop the pan my Dolly". Oh - that made me so mad, made me so made - mind you we used that pan for years after, and Ted and I would always have a chuckle whenever we used it.

I never forgot when I was in town with her and we went to the drapers shop to buy some material - She had every blessed roll of the stuff off the shelves. I got so exasperated, I said to the sales girl "Tell her there's no more rolls left" - Gran said "I'm not deaf you know - I'm only hard of hearing". I thought `my gosh' and with that walked out and left her - I went home. Arthur's like that too (Arthur Russ) I remember the time he was in Uley Post Office and he had every blessed toy off the shelf -In the end he didn't buy any (because he couldn't fine what he wanted). I couldn't be like that - I'm different all together.

Oh yes, that was it when she took a little case with her, to buy a marrow. I felt so sorry for the poor kid behind the counter - She was one of my singers. The marrow Gran bought was far too large to go into the case, but she wouldn't have it - it had to go in. The people behind her were held up for ages, about quarter of an hour, I think.

They were going "tut, tut, tut, tut….". I don't know what did happen in the end because I just left her - I think she had to have it in a carrier bag in the end!

It was absolutely appalling when Gran Pratt washed herself in the front room; I use to be ashamed that people looking in could see Gran Pratt with no cloths on. She would use just an ordinary washing-up bowl on the dining table. She would take her cloths off and wash, but never pulled the curtains so people going by could see her - if they looked in. Gran Pratt's use to say, "If anybody looks in and sees me, then it's their fault for looking", she would maintain that it was a private house; a private room and nobody should look into other peoples private rooms. I think that was because of the way she was bought up, with no curtains at Latteridge. At Latteridge, George Burgess didn't have curtains because he believed they were dust collectors, and Gran Pratt said they didn't need them as the only things that could see them were rabbits - because they were so isolated.

But what use to really annoy me was her blooming keys - She kept them all on a piece of string around her waist. Every time she went in and out of her bedroom, or to the kitchen, she'd lock the door behind her. I busted the lock and broke down her door twice, where I got so savage. Yes -but she didn't give me any privacy, she'd come in and out of my room because it was Teddies - And what was Teddies was hers. She'd keep saying to me "He's my boy not yours, he's my boy not yours". And I'd always said "I never had Grace until Gran died". The tickling part was when she would tie cotton to the door - So she'd know when Elsie came (Bill's sister). She wouldn't have her in the house. I don't know why, but she just wouldn't. It was most awkward -It led to bad feelings between us, but they understood and we stayed good friends, and when Ted was in hospital, Bill went and seen him two or three times.

Mr Pratt and Gran Pratt sort of kept everything apart. What was his was his, and what was hers, was hers. The best of his stuff had gone down to Bill (his son) before he died. I'd say that I'd never advise anyone to get married if there are kids on both sides - because there is always trouble. When the two of them were together (Mr & Mrs Pratt) she was always up against him, and it was then so difficult to get on with either of them. And when he got funny (touchy) with her, he'd go up the garden (to calm down). However, when he was down Ham Green, I got on with him lovely.

But I had an awful time when he died - She wouldn't have his coffin in her room - So it had to stay in the Hall. It was so embarrassing when people came to the door. Mind you the funniest thing was when Tommy Harris (the undertaker) came to take the coffin away - Gran Pratt was reading a book called `Dead on Time' and on the day he was buried, she was out the front mowing the grass.

Then there were always conflicts with our neighbours, she would cut off anything that grew over into our garden, and throw it back into their garden - and things like that. I'd recently came across one of her letters, where she'd say we were poisoning her - by putting something in the vinegar - Said she was out cold for 24 hours. She was always writing letters like that, and sending them to our neighbours’ - But they'd bring them all back to us, so we'd know what they said. And then she accused our mum of putting flies in the milk - Oh, she was a terror. In fact she got awful towards the end. She suffered from incontinence - I'd say, "It's all down your stockings", and she'd say "There's nothing on my stockings". I had the same problem with Uncle Arthur when I was looking after him - he had cancer of the prostrate gland. I used to say to him, "Now look Uncle, I'm used to dong this kind of thing, let me clean it up", but he was so particular that he wanted to do it himself - but it only made it harder for me - I had to clear it all up in the end. But going back to Gran Pratt -The day before she died I said, "Have you got any dirty washing, because I'm doing some washing to put into the machine", she said "Nope, nope" - And when we came back from our mum's funeral we found Grand Pratt dead, and a bucket full of muck in her room.